So, I purchased two tickets to see Jeremy Passion in London on the 31st of March. Since none of my friends listen to Passion, I didn’t want to go by myself so I thought, I’ll purchase two tickets and then figure out who to go with. That’s when I realised that I could ask the guy that I like!
I had it all planned out! I would ask him on Friday (yesterday).
So I went into uni, and the weather was amazing! Everyone was out on the grass on campus and having some cool drinks. Then, I saw him! He looked so hot! Then he disappeared and showed up with a girl. The girl I always used to see him with. They were holding hands, hugging, kissing and it was so heart breaking. =[
I also found out that someone I know has known him since college. I asked her a few questions about him (I know it sounds stalker-ish!). She mentioned a long term relationship. But like I said in my previous posts, he said that he was single. Now he is back with her.
I don’t know if I am happy that I didn’t ask him out or ‘make a move’, or if I regret not doing anything.
The first thing I thought was, I should have said something. But then I thought about what would have happened if I did say something. I would have still got hurt. If it went well, we would have went out on a date, got to know each other more, I would fall for him even more and then he would have gotten back together with his ex.
But now I am thinking, what did I have to lose? It could have went the other way and I might have been with him now.
Now, I am kicking myself because this isn’t the first time this has happened to me with a guy. I am too shy. And even with all my friends telling me to go and talk to him I didn’t have the guts to. And I really need to grow some balls.
It’s very rare for me to like someone so much. Every time I do like someone that much, I don’t get anything out of it.
I know it’s rich coming from me, since I have no balls but, girls, please, if you like someone, do something about it because if you don’t another girl who is more confident will get him. I wish I had seen that sooner. And the worst thing that could happen is that you will know that he doesn’t feel the same. That is actually a good thing because you know where you stand and you have closure.